Painful Discipleship

The house I currently reside in has many windows along the backside.  The backyard extends about ten yards from the house then drops off sharp to a creek about 20 yards down the hill.  This time of year I have groundhogs and squirrels running ramped and thick tall oaks budding along the hill.  It's nothing to look out one of these body-length windows at groundhogs that weigh 25 lbs sitting up on big rocks that support the bank. Sometimes I swear they're laughing and talking to each other.

With all the rain that has graced us this spring, you can imagine the robins that are everywhere looking and digging for worms.  On robin has made an impact.

I came home one morning from training at our box, as I walked in my back door I heard a bang coming from upstairs.  Then again, and again.  It was sounding about every fifteen seconds.  My first thought was someone is in the house.  Halfway up the stairs, the noise stopped.  Looking in the room,  I couldn't find anything.  Down the stairs and outside to see if I could figure this out.  I leaned out my door, and there she was.  A small robin was perched on a rod iron flower box hanging directly out from my upstairs window.  She looked at me, then looked back at my window and again flew into the window determined to get to whatever she believed to be what she wanted beyond that barrier.

Would you praise her determination or criticize at the insanity?

My first reaction was, "Oh my gosh!  Please stop!  That has to hurt!"

Sometimes our suffering is self-inflicted and it's only goal is unwarranted, unnecessary pain.  But my thoughts quickly turned to near applause and amazement.  There was something she wanted.  Something she thought was worthy of the pain she was inflicting upon herself.  Have you ever loved someone with all of your heart.  Well aware this made you vulnerable to complete heartbreak?  A Mom or Dad's love for their child has to be that raw and pure.  Have you ever set a goal that, to reach would be gratifying but the road getting there was paved with physically challenging, mentally draining obstacles.  I have.  Could my little robin be my reminder that passion, desire in action is - should be - paved with painful discipleship.  A life lived half way is no life at all.  Abandon your temptation to not go thru the pain and commit whole-heartedly to the goal.

Two weeks passed, my little hero's attempts have gotten fewer.  On single occasions, every other day, I hear her try again.  The compassion in me has made me analyze her behavior and the symbolism in my own life.  What about unrealistic expectations.  Not about goals we set for ourselves.  The expectations we put on others.  My robin saw a tree in the reflection of the window.  She wanted the window to be a tree, and she desperately, tirelessly is trying to make the window a tree.  She's willing to put herself thru countless blows and give her time putting unrealistic expectations on my window.  Have you been spending your life beneath your purpose because you live in unrealistic thought?  When we are used to being chained in thought, being "tied-up" feels normal.

Do you have a story you want to share with me?  Are you living passionately and fully free?  E-mail or post to the comments; chastitylayne@aol.com

Nothing Looks As Good As CrossFit Feels

Monica

A friend of mine from out of town ventured into my CrossFit box (Practice CrossFit) today just to kinda hang out and wait for our coffee date.

I have yet to convince this friend, who was no stranger to working out, to give CrossFit a try. In fact she was a figure competitor as well, looked gorgeous and had a rocking body about three weeks out from a show.

"Are you ready for a show", she asked? "No, I'm over three weeks into our six week open season", I replied. "Oh, well you look like you could step on stage right now, does Crossfit require the same diet", she asked? With a smile I said, "no, not even close. I still consume 4-5 meals a day, but I could do less, many of my athletes fast weekly, and survive well on two meals a day. I hardly eat a single carb and if I do its green. And my fat content in one meal is close to half the daily calories I was allowed when I was doing figure shows, and I never have cravings (ok almost never).

My friend stared at me as if I was lying to her. "You must be working out constantly", she said. "Well once a day five days a week, for about 5-20 minutes at a time", I muttered realizing she was becoming more and more irritated.

"Roll out" came loudly, and just in the nick of time. I think my friend was going to lynch me. She sat down and watched us go through our normal Practice CrossFit roll session, warm-up, tutorials, strength, and WOD. When our class was finished the majority of us took a knee, walked around aimlessly, or simply fell to the floor in presumable despair.

After our CF display my friend says, "I get it, its way harder that's, why it works faster, and better". I thought, If Josh was here he would clap for the simplicity of this revelation. As he says all the time, "Intensity is exactly equal to results".

"I don't want to work that hard to look good like you. I will just take it easier and pay my dues slowly," she said. At that moment I realized how far I had come from my figure days. Sure I like having Abs, a couple of veins, shoulders that are round and a booty to match, but that has really become second nature. A happy side effect to CrossFit training. "Well maybe one day you will change your mind", I told her.

All she saw was the effort, the sweat, the complicated movements. All she developed was fear. Its funny how different some people are. Some of us come into a CrossFit and never want to leave. Others only see the difficulty. Sure I wanna look good, but more importantly I wanna feel like I look good, and you can't believe how good CrossFit makes you feel until you try it.

Are You A Feeler, Or A Spotter?

I recently attended a church sermon where the pastor described the different form of gymnasts on the vault. The simplistic description of these two forms of Gymnasts not only makes me think of CrossFit, but how we engage the beauty of life as well.

Imagine, all eyes on you as you enter your runway. A chance for the Gold. The Silver. Maybe the Bronze. Maybe the perfect "10". Maybe a broken ankle. Can you feel your eyes focus as you see the vault you are going to attack. Can you feel your blood run hot, your knuckles turn white. The sound leave. Can you feel it....that's life.

All of the sudden everything leaves as you take your first step. A wondrous release. All the fear must be gone. All the doubt must leave. All the eyes must disappear. Its you, the runway to the vault, to the jump, to the land, to the applause.

Both a spotter and a feeler approach the target in the same manner. The difference is the spotter chooses to keep their eyes open as they turn in mid-air. They orientate using their eyes and keep constant visual cues in check. Conversely after a feeler leaps, they close their eyes. They memorize the necessary movement rotation speed and essential blindly feel their way throughout the air igniting their yes once they need be done, if they were right, success, if not, collision.

You can't get farther from each other. Eyes open and eyes closed are two simple variables that lie eons apart from each other. Its unimaginable the difference. But the best thing is, a "Perfect Ten" can occur to both. Regardless if you fear the floor, and you turn with your eyes closed, or if your faith is just enough to jump with eyes wide open.

The end is the same, and so was the path. Both had to do the single most important thing many of us miss everyday. They had to look down the same runway. And they both had to run and vault.

Its guaranteed that weather your a spotter or a feeler that you have fallen. That you have failed. That you have turned the potential Gold to dust, in an instant. But at least you ran. At least you vaulted. And If your willing to run again and vault, eyes open or eyes shut, one day you will get that medal.

Who hopes for what they already have?

I find myself continually confronted by the concept of pain and suffering. I also find myself continually drawn to these Verses found in Romans 8:

¹⁸ I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. ¹⁹ For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. ²⁰ For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope ²¹ that^[h] the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God.